why I’m leaving the cult of wokeness
(originally published 2nd January 2021 - 50+ million readers)
If there's one thing I'm NOT afraid of, it's being 'cancelled'.
If being cancelled means me living in integrity as a human being who thinks for themselves, CANCEL ME TODAY!
I repeat; I am not afraid.
What I'm truly afraid of is existing in a world that forces me to submit to an ideology without question, otherwise I'm to be shamed (or pressured to shame myself) and cast out of the community.
A world that tells me that because I inhabit a black body; I will forever be oppressed and at the mercy ofsome omnipresent monster called 'whiteness'.
That because of the colour of my skin; I am a victim of an inherently racist system by default - and me rejecting the narrative of oppression means that I am in fact in denial.
How empowering!
You know, as someone that comes from Zimbabwe, a country where the general population is truly oppressed, it perplexes me that oppression is now being worn as an identity piece in most parts of the West, especially by those who claim to be 'progressive'.
What I'm truly afraid of is existing in a world that forces me to consider the colour of my skin and my gender (and that of others) at every fucking turn, instead of prioritising the content of mine and other people's character (*MLK*).
I dread the prospect of a world where context, nuance, critical thinking, meritocracy, science, and rationality are considered tools of 'white supremacy', and you're not allowed to question or argue this senseless statement.
A world that is conditioning you and I to believe that we will always be trapped in some weird hierarchy because of our race, our genitals, our physical abilities, our neurodiversity, our sexuality, and our politics.
And that if we do not agree on every single thing that comes from whatever side we pick (LEFT or RIGHT because you're spoilt for choice), it's a sign that we are interacting with an enemy - or at the very least, someone to be wildly suspicious and judgmental of.
I wish this world I speak of was just a figment of my imagination, but chances are if you're still reading this, even the tiniest part of you knows that we are already inside this world. Our suitcases have been unpacked here for quite some time.
This seems to be an authoritarian world that has been fiercely crafted under the guise of 'social justice', and I want no parts in this. I AM OUT.
As someone that, politically speaking, leans left on most things, the current state of affairs and this call for obedience is NOT what I signed up for.
I never signed up to be hit over the head with disempowering narratives that tell me that I need to refer to myself as a 'person of colour', a minority, a marginalised person, and BAME (UK version of BIPOC).
My goodness, I hate all of these terms with all of my being, and I rarely use the word hate.
Please, if we ever need to address my racial identity, which we really don't need to do as often as you might think...BLACK works just fine, it's not a dirty word.
And remember; it's okay if the language I mentioned before is affirming for you, we are allowed to disagree - but for ME, it does nothing but give me false reminders of my supposed oppression...which rubs me the wrong way entirely because I AM NOT OPPRESSED.
And I think it's key that we accept that black people don't all share a singular experience.
Shocking I know.
'We are not a monolith' has become a common statement within communities that identify as marginalised, and while I wholeheartedly agree, I've noticed that despite this being a popular mantra - when someone 'steps out of line' or dares to think differently...it's a different story.
You will often have pleasure of being told you have some kind of 'internalised______'. Fun culty vibes.
I want better for us because it's all getting a bit much (especially in the social justice/woke spaces), and it scares me to know that it's become controversial to address any concerns or express a differing viewpoint.
I'm so happy that these are conversations that are now happening with many black people in my life (online and offline), including my family who spend very little time online, only subscribe to honest movements, are willing to have healthy debates, and couldn't give a crap about identity politics.
What is worrying though is how many more of us feel afraid to talk to our own friends, our partners, our spouses, our colleagues, our family - in case we are branded as 'wrong-thinkers'. It's even harder if you're white because there's usually someone just waiting to call you racist.
And usually what happens is that if you DARE express these fears or your feelings, you'll be accused of'centering your white feelings', and of exuding 'white guilt'....how is this not racist? I don't understand. The LITERAL definition of racism is "prejudiced against or antagonistic towards a person or people on the basis of their membership of a particular racial or ethnic group".
This then means that some choose to not say anything at all (which creates resentment because that's the nature of suppression & self-censorship), and some choose to comply and pretend they are on board with anything and everything (whilst also secretly resenting that they can't truly express their thoughts, ideas, feelings, etc).
And for saying the above I'm sure someone out there will lovingly label me a 'white apologist'...
This is where we're at people.
And like I said at the beginning, when it comes to this - I am unafraid.
This is my open letter detailing some of the things that have led me to this point, because if there's something that this past year has taught me; it's that my wellbeing and that of those around me (including the collective), is infinitely more important than any temporary discomfort that might come with me doing what I know to be right.
I also want to let you know that I'm not writing this to convince you of anything, your agreement is welcome but it's not a requirement, I'm not writing this from a place of animosity or anger, I'm not writing this on behalf of any individual, group, movement, organisation, or community.
I am writing this to free myself, I am writing this for myself.
And for you if you need it.
Just like you; I am entitled to my own opinions, I have every right to question things that don't feel aligned with my values, morals, ethics, and beliefs. I have every right to pushback if I recognise that I'm being forced to comply with ideologies and practices that don't make sense to me (which is how I've felt this past year).
I don't want to live my life in a perpetual fearful state, I don't want to spend my life thinking that everything that doesn't go my way is because of my skin colour, I don't want to spend the rest of my life unable to have insightful conversations with those that think differently to me...I really don't.
I'm tired of hearing that because I'm black I should feel victimised. That because I'm black I should agree with everything that black people do and say (surely NOONE should have this expected of them).
None of these narrow definitions of human existence help me. None of that helps my community. I reject the idea that I am a victim. I reject the idea that I am oppressed. I reject the idea that white people exist to oppress and should be reminding me of their privilege every 2 seconds, while simultaneously telling me that they are above me.
How is this helpful!? If anything, it's deeply offensive.
There's no question about it; being black is a beautiful part of who I am, but it's not all I am - not even close. My identity (race, gender, sexuality, body parts) will never be more important than my humanity and my wholeness. EVER.
Because of this, I fervently reject the idea that all white people are racist and must be shamed into confessing their sins and admitting complicity in all of their ancestors indiscretions...simply because ofthe colour of their skin.
My own ancestors have participated in some FUCKERY and I would not want to live the rest of my life being punished for their actions.
I struggle to see how shaming others (or shaming yourself) for having white skin is an essential part any of fuelling true social change. Surely this is regressive? It also sounds a little like the very thing we've spent years moving away from...
I'm committed to understanding human behaviour (this is also at the core of what I do professionally), I'm committed to compassion and kindness without excusing that which must be acknowledged.
I'm well aware of the systems we live under. I acknowledge reality but I refuse to be a slave to a disempowering narrative that rarely focuses on actual solutions.
I never want to forget that you can still be compassionate with those you don't agree with. And this way of thinking is what I CHOOSE because it makes my time on planet earth better, you don't have to take it on if it doesn't work for you.
This is not what this is about.
I want to live a life that isn't centred around identity politics and all that comes with it, so much more in my life takes priority.
I want to remain open to new ideas, perspectives, and thoughts - so that I can grow, course correct where necessary, and make a genuine impact on a local and global level.
I want to give people the benefit of the doubt and continue using discernment instead of making sweeping harmful (often lazy) assumptions based on the colour of people's skin or their gender.
I refuse to take on the black or white thinking because I've seen and experienced the grave harm that does.
As I move into this next season of my life, I'm more interested in the grey area.
The nail in the coffin for me was all the events that took place last Summer.
Last Summer in the height of the Black Lives Matter movement, I noticed a shadowy part of me emerging and although I didn't judge it, I wasn't comfortable with what was coming up.
All the critical social justice dogma I'd been consciously and consciously imbibing took a HUGE toll on my mental health and I hadn't even realised that I wasn't functioning as a full human being until it reached it's peak.
That unpleasant internal experience I had was essential for me to be where I am now.
On social media I was DEEP is various social justice echo chambers that shared more than enough infographics, stories, feed posts, IG LIVES, to make my fight or flight response go nuts. I was in constant fight mode, and wasn't aware.
I found myself subconsciously looking for things that would piss me off, which is another symptom of wokeness (as we know it today) that seems to show up in many people - hundreds of you have shared your experiences with me in the past month alone and the similarities are alarming.
Before reacting to things, I did ZERO in-depth research of my own. I didn't question the sources I was listening to in the way I could have, it was ALL reactionary.
I didn't realise I had many people on pedestals that they shouldn't have been on in the first place (no fault of their own, I put them there), I was running purely based on emotion and feelings that gave my nervous system the signal that I was under threat.
And that's the energy I acted and spoke from.
I rashly unfollowed some people on my social media that I had decided should have 'spoken up'...simply because based on my egos time frame they weren't responding as they 'should'.
I'm sure I re-shared something about 'white silence' being 'violence' (an oversimplified and unfair statement I no longer agree with, but we'll go into it another time)….
and I publicly shamed an unsuspecting man (who I immediately assumed to be white...he was mixed race) who had messaged me to question me about my conduct, and even though his approach was not a welcome one, he wasn't unkind to me - which is why I'm not proud of the unkind way in which I reacted...not responded, reacted.
What frightened me was the applause I got from over 4,000 people when I called out this man in a feed post - I didn't say anything wild, but I did deconstruct his direct message publicly with the intention to embarrass him, not to solve anything - to embarrass.
I was honestly shocked by how many people used the environment I had created to exercise pack mentality, and to casually shame and scold a stranger - of which I take responsibility for as the person that created that environment.
I now know that is is all too common in most echo chambers on social media, and it's unhealthy.
This is when I removed the post and started asking myself some questions; who am I doing this for? why did my interaction with this man need to be publicised? what is the root of the anger I feel? what research have I done to support the ideology I'm taking on? are there any alternative sources?
I'm of the belief that there is such a thing as justified anger, and I believe that all emotions and expressions have their place - but I know myself well enough to know that the way I handled that particular situation was not necessary.
This incident led me start doing more research around the cancel culture phenomenon. And it's just one tiny recent example of how some of this stuff has showed up in my life over the past 2 years.
SO, why am I calling 'WOKENESS' as we know it today a cult?
Well, first lets start by defining what the term woke even means. It's a term that been around for a very long time but has lost all of it's meaning in recent years.
Woke: a term embedded in US Black History and social justice which originally meant being aware, well-informed, and up to date with what was happening within the community.
"Stay woke became a watch word in parts of the black community for those who considered themselves self-aware, questioning the dominant paradigm, and striving for something better" - and these are the sentiments I will always stand for, however...
This is NOT how it's defined these days, and you can read this interesting article to get a timeline of how it's commonly used in the present day, and I'll continue sharing with you the specific pockets of'wokeness' and social justice that I have divorced myself from.
I can no longer be an active participant in any culture or movement that encourages groupthink, outrage on demand, inciting fear, encouraging violence, revamped segregation, fabricating history, cancellations masked as accountability, self-centredness...
normalisation of racism towards white people, the disempowerment of black people masked as social justice, the constant redefining of existing language, ignoring self-responsibility, constant pathologizing, oppressed vs oppressor mentality, and the pressure to conform and comply...
It's exhausting. And honestly, I have better things to do with my time.
And I find it very telling that people who are married to these spaces will immediately assume that those that are encouraging for more compassion, understanding, room for discussion, removal ofcensorship - only want these things so they can have free reign to be bigots, sexist, 'fascists', racists, homophobes, etc.
As a black woman who wants more compassion, understanding, healthy discussion, empathy, removal of censorship, more tolerance when it matters most...I can guarantee you that my final goal isn't so I can be a racist sexist fascist alt-righter extremist.
LOL.
And if you can give me a pass based on the fact that I'm black, what makes someone who happens to be white any less sincere if they want the exact same thing as me? Which many people do!
I hope you can sort of see just how oversimplified a lot of this madness is. It's causing lasting harm and it's distracting us from the very real work that needs to be done to unite us as human beings.
I will stick to my guns by saying that the turn we're taking because of critical social justice and this current strain of branded monetised wokeness - is not going to take us to the promised land (SPOILER: there is no utopia, I'm sorry to break it to you).
But what do I know!
As someone who will never stop advocating for human rights (fairness, equality, access to resources, respect, independence - for ALL, not just for people who share my skin tone and gender), I have come to realise that I do not need to be part of any groups or wear any labels to make a positive contribution to this planet of ours.
These are the times when I am incredibly grateful for the upbringing I've had, both in Zimbabwe and here in the UK. I'm grateful that I was raised to think for myself, and that's what I'll continue to do.
I was raised to not judge people based on the colour of their skin, no matter what. And that's what I'll continue to do.
YES, I could choose to carry animosity in my heart based on the pain my ancestors experienced - but what does that do for me and mental state, my community, and those I interact with in the present day?
I wasn't really raised to ask many questions, but in adulthood asking powerful questions (even when they are simple) is something that has become a non-negotiable- and that's what I will continue to do.
I will continue to trust myself and question things. I will do my own research before responding purely based on emotion. I will keep myself open to having challenging conversations if I have the capacity to do so, and if I don't have the capacity to engage I will still not shut anyone down - unless necessary.
My biggest realisation has been that most of these people that pose as Social Justice Warriors, Activists, Agents of Change etc - don't actually want to improve and repair society.
A lot of the people I know in these spaces have brands and careers, management teams from this, which often means that they will continue to find everything wrong with society instead of making consistent efforts to unite and truly empower.
There's a sinister side to all of this that not many people aren't comfortable speaking about, and it's unfair to all those who end up being sucked into these echo chambers and movements with the promise of community and betterment.
A lot of us just want to help. We want to see change! This leaves us vulnerable to questionable leaders and organisations that set themselves so that you cannot questions their practices and agenda.
The similarities of wokeness/critical social justice to fundamentalist religion (something I'm VERY familiar with) is why I choose to call it a cult, the framework and tactics are eerily similar.
This is why I have decided to speak out. If you do not agree with this, and this has not been your experience - that's okay. I respect your right to own your experience. Of course we have different views, we lives different lives. That's normal.
What ISN'T normal, is forcing people to comply and bow down to an ideology, simply because YOU think it's the right one.
If you resonate with what I've shared in this letter, please know that you are not alone. You are allowed to change your mind. You are allowed to grow. You don't have to pray to a single political idea, movement, or group - nor do you have to agree with EVERYTHING presented to you as the absolute truth.
If you have read this far, I appreciate your time and your attention. Remember that we still have to co-exist on this planet, so expecting everyone you encounter to agree with your every belief or view that you hold - is fucking wild LOL.
I'll stop here because I could go on, there is so much to say - I honestly feel like this letter is just the foundation of the conversations I REALLY want to have...
so I will likely explore some of the specificities in podcast form (I'm thinking of producing and hosting a new podcast that specifically talks about these themes, thoughts? My existing podcast Beyond the Self won't be going anywhere!) or through some LIVES over on Instagram.
I encourage to break out of echo chambers (especially on social media) and explore yourself BEYOND your race, your pronouns, your genitals, your sexuality, your physical capabilities, your politics - those things have their place but there is so much more to you.
And in fact, when you do go beyond those neatly prescribed boxes, you become more secure within your identity. I urge you to unsubscribe to anyone and anything that is proving detrimental to your mental wellbeing. You deserve better!
I wish you a wonderful 2021,
Africa
✨
Excuse all typos, it’s called passion and flow. You have my consent to respectfully share this letter, let's continue the conversation! If you share any parts of it on social media, please credit properly and tag me (@africabrooke) so I can see it - I'd appreciate it.